10 Lessons I learned as a New Mom

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Hi Everyone,

This is my second time celebrating Mother’s Day, and it’s one of my favorite holidays. Not only because I am a Mom, but because I love to celebrate my Mom. For those of you who are new, I have a 1 year old named Tommy. He is the Love of my life and I thank God every day for him. I have heard people say that when you become a Mom, everything changes and that is exactly how it was for me. I never believed it, but it is true. Here are 10 lessons I have learned as a new Mama.

One: You are braver and stronger than you ever would think.

It’s not easy being a first time parent. There are new challenges, stresses, learning curbs, and not to mention you get really really tired. I never knew how strong I was and how much I could endure until I became a new mother. I remember when Tommy was a baby, I think I barely slept the first week. It’s all about survival and the first time I stayed with him alone, I was so nervous but somehow I did it. My sister always jokes and says every mama should say: I gave birth, don’t mess with me! haha

Two: Let Go

When I first held Tommy in my arms, all I wanted to do was to protect him and do everything for him. It was hard for me to let my family members take care of him. I wanted to be in control of everything. It was really hard especially when I went to work. I made a huge list and a schedule and I was so upset if it wasn’t followed exactly. You know what? I realized that my parents and my in laws raised several great kids and they would never put my child in danger. It’s okay if he missed his 4:30 feeding and it was at 5:30 instead. Sometimes you have to just go with the flow. That might be hard for some of you reading this, it has been hard at times for me too. But I have learned to trust and not sweat the small stuff.

Three: Pray

After I had Tommy, I was healing from an emergency surgery because I over bled. I was given tons of different pieces of advice, mostly all conflicting with one another. I was worried about everything and then I realized that I needed to pray and ask God what to do and ask him to lead me. That’s exactly what I did. I would pray and ask God to give me wisdom. I pray everyday for Tommy and for God to help us be good parents. It wasn’t easy in the beginning but little by little I learned and am still learning.

Four: Laugh

When Tommy was first born, I would be so stressed out about everything from bath time to feedings. I think part of that is just hormones and lack of sleep (it was for me at least). Now, when something small happens, my husband and I laugh it off. The other day, Tommy had a melt down because I wouldn’t let him run down the pier while we were at the beach. I knew it wasn’t safe and unfortunately he wouldn’t calm down and we had to leave. As soon as we get to the car, it’s like everything is fine and he wasn’t just screaming his head off. I kept joking in the care about it: Hey, remember when you had a melt down? That was a lot of fun! Don’t get me wrong, I don’t laugh at everything but I’m not gonna sweat the small stuff…he’s only one.

Five: Legacy

I realized after I gave birth that I wanted to leave a legacy for him. My parents have created huge shoes for me to fill. I want to do the same for Tommy. I want him to take what I have done and build on it and keep growing. For generations, I want my kids and grandkids to be the best they can be and make a positive impact in the world. This means, I don’t want to be afraid anymore. I don’t want to be afraid to take chances like writing a blog…lol. I was so afraid to write a blog, it took me 3 years to gather the courage. I was so afraid of what others thought. Well, I don’t want that for my son. So I’m working on my brave.

Six: It takes a Tribe

Many times people have said:  I don’t know how you do it all or where you find the time. Well, I am not alone. My husband helps me a lot in everything as I do for him. We support each other and lift each other up. I also have my family and my husband’s family who are very supportive and love Tommy like their own. I think if I didn’t have such a great support system, it would be harder to balance it all. 

Seven: Children are a Blessing

When I first found out I was pregnant, I was so worried. I had so many questions and most of them started with: How. How am I… How do I… It was scary at first. I wanted a child, we planned on it but now here it is and I am responsible for a life that isn’t my own any more. I still sometimes worry about the “How” but I remind myself to trust in God for help. 

Eight: You don’t have to Please everyone, Do what’s right for you

When I first became a parent, I was trying to do everything like my sister or my friends. Then, I realized I couldn’t keep up with it. I had to be me. If you’re a Mom or inspiring Mom, I want to encourage you: You have to do what is best for you and your family- even if others don’t agree. I (and my husband) am responsible for Tommy. We have to do what’s best for him. We take the advice we get, but at the end of the day we make the call. It’s hard to do that (at least for me) but I have to raise Tommy the best way possible that works for us.

Nine: There’s no right way to “Mom”

I see so many people on the internet saying: Moms should stay home and raise their kids or Moms should work because its unhealthy to stay home. Really? How about do what’s best for you and what works for you. If it means staying home, then do it! if it means working and having a career, then do it! There is no right or wrong. My Mom worked most of my life and I turned out great. I have a cousin who’s Mom stayed home and you know what, he turned out great too! There isn’t any right or wrong as long as you are doing what is best for you and your family.

Ten: Have Fun!

People would tell me: Enjoy this age while it lasts because they grow up fast. As I was sitting with a little baby in my arms, it was hard to imagine. But, I feel like they are right. Tommy is going to be two this year and we are already looking into preschools for next year. I mean, how did that happen? I feel like it’s so fast. If you are a Mom, you get it. One of my goals this year is to “Enjoy the Moment”. So, we are working hard to appreciate every stage and enjoy the moment we are in. I don’t want to spend my whole life saying: I can’t wait until …… I want to say I love this moment, now. 

Whether you are a Mom, New Mom (like me), aspiring Mom or want to celebrate a Mom in your life; I want you to know: You are important, you are valued, and you are amazing. 

Happy Mother’s Day

XO, Carol

 

 

 

Quick Shop: Rachel Parcel Blue Dress

Ps. I have a recent blog post on gifts ideas for Mother’s day here.

Thank you to Ellen from youngmommylove.com for taking the photos.

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